Your Partner’s Sexual Past
If you are having trouble with the sexual past of your girlfriend then you might have googled this question and had a pool of suggestions of how to deal with the sexual past of your loved one. Majority of the people who have not faced a similar situation would curse you and told you to just man up and stop judging someone for the past life. Moreover, there are some people who blame the girl for everything that went wrong in the relationship and would advise you to never trust the women and your feelings are completely justified. In a struggling situation like this, a genuine and helping advice is surely difficult to act because of the mindset of every person. They don’t understand your position and start judging you for your feelings. So let’s discuss the problem on its merit and analyze the possible solution to this problem.
Admitting The Reality
You need to understand and accept that you are the one who is getting hurt with these talks; you need to accept the reality. Maybe your girlfriend is not realizing that you are troubled with these talks and rightly so because it is your problem and you have to own it. There is nothing wrong in admitting the reality. This will be the first step towards solving the problem. This will stop you from hurting your girlfriend by unconsciously punishing her by not giving your 100% in the relationship. You need to realize this as quickly as possible that no one can save you from this situation except yourself.
Accepting The Problem
If you need some time to process the information, avail it so you won’t affect your relationship. After accepting the problem you need to quickly stop talking about the past, so you won’t go to the limit of never coming back to the trusting terms. You need to process the problem and talk about the parts that you are most uncomfortable with your girlfriend so she could understand your situation and might provide a possible explanation or cut you some kind of slack during the troubling time.
The Talking Step
Any problem’s severity can be reduced to half by sharing the problem with someone who understands you and won’t judge and provide the best possible advice. You can with your older male friends or the friends that are in the relationship. Pour your heart out and mention every small detail that is bothering you and forcing you to end the relationship even if she is doing the best to hold you closer. After explaining your whole story ask them about their feedback and what will be your next step. You need to calm your ego and listen to the words of wisdom from more experienced one, this could really help to initiate some sort of way out or a clear idea about how to deal the particular situation. The talking step might feel like a waste of time or a minor step but these simple steps are often game changers sorting out the troubling relationships.
If she is the one bringing up the conversations, you need to stop her as quickly as you can because if you let her allow to go on she might get the feeling that you are comfortable with these talks and without her knowing you will be getting hurt emotionally. Handle the situation without intimidating her and tell her politely to keep this kind of thoughts to herself and you are open to hearing her issues but talks about retroactive past are hurting you and are so close in destroying the relationship.