‘How many times does the average person fall in love?’ is a question that demands serious addressing. Statistics and studies show that the average age of falling in love starts from our adolescence. From a very early time in our life, we start believing in the concept of true love and start exploring for it. Depending on the sources, the experience and duration of the first relationship, the number of times we can fall in love can be determined. Statistics and studies say that on an average, we can fall in love for about two to seven times in our whole life.
Factors affecting love-life in individuals
1. Experience and duration of the first relationship
People believe that our first love can never be forgotten. First relationship and first time being in love happen at a very young age on an average. People fall in madly and are even pretty vulnerable during that span of time. In the period of adolescence, people aren’t completely matured and they do mistakes mostly in this stage of their life. They fail to choose, or valence the features of the partner as being correct for them or not. Therefore, it results in a failed relationship. Statistics say that people try to hold on and struggle the most to solve the problems for the sake of their first love, and hence the duration of the first relationship is quite longer than the others. Due to all these reasons, the first relationship becomes the model or a schema which works as a comparison model for other relationships. It provides us with a dictionary, comprising the dos and don’ts, and rules of love relationships. Hence, it determines the number of times we will fall in love.
2. Coping a bad relationship
Our bad experiences in the very first relationship make it hard to cope with them. Memories and the residual one-sided love make it difficult for the individual to fall in love once again in life. Studies say that there are people who cannot get on to other relationships ever again in their life after a sour experience of their first relationship. The bitter memories hinder a positive coping with the trauma of a broken relationship, and it even makes the person lose faith in the concept of love.
3. Optimists and believers in true love
There are people who are just opposite of the ones explained in the former point. They have a positive view towards life. They can heal themselves from a bad relationship with maturity. They never give up their search for true love. Statistics show that these kinds of people can fall in love a number of times.
In the search for true love, they embrace the love they feel for someone and continue experiencing the love relationships. They believe that they can learn from every failed relationship and can make their new relationship better.
4. Falling for a person instead of falling in love with a person
The one who falls for the person create a false belief that it is true love. They often confuse infatuation with love. Love is more than physical attraction and lust. It is more complicated where several factors are embedded. If you truly love your partner, then there must be a strong sense of commitment. There should be physical as well as mental intimacy between the couple and there must be a mutual understanding among them. They must have mutual respect for each other. Last but not the least, there must a bunch of passion for each other in the relationship.
Therefore, some people fail to differentiate between infatuation and love. For them, they can fall in love for a number of times.
5. The concept of one love
There are some people who strongly believe in the concept that love can happen only once in the whole lifetime. If it happens again, then it isn’t that true love. They believe that love is the most complex but purest form of emotion, and ‘to love’ means, ‘to love unconditionally’. Once they fall in love, they are committed to loving them wholeheartedly throughout their life.
6. Biased and anticipated evaluations
When we get attracted towards anyone, it is our very basic mistake to see only the features which match with our requirements. We typically overlook or omit the others which can be incompatible with us. Due to our attraction towards the person, we rush to be with them, but in a long run the incompatibilities create a problem in the relationship and result in break ups. In our busy growing world, we fail to learn from our mistakes and we go on doing the same things.
These are some of the major determinants that influence the number of times people can fall in love. To fall in love with someone is pleasant but at the same time, it brings so many challenges. While a person starts falling in love with someone, the experience of that pleasant feeling is accompanied by several other negatives which hold the person back. Other priorities in life, commitment to someone else, free-floating personality, and many other factors influence our strong feeling of love.