Love is hard to find but falling in love and experiencing it is beautiful. At the same time, love means experiencing a complex set of emotions, the presence of commitment, passion and intimacy. Maintaining a balance among these three is very crucial for a successful relationship. Therefore, falling in love and finding our true love becomes cumbersome at times. There are several reasons, which serve as a hindrance in finding our true love. But if we get to identify the reasons, we can work on those and can definitely find our true love.
Reasons why it’s so Hard to Find True Love Nowadays
1. Internal criterion level
Our culture and society majorly serve to design our internal demands of a perfect partner. Our past experiences, love stories which we read from our very childhood, the concept of dream boy/girl and discussion about it among peers, media, knowledge of a friend’s or sibling’s partner forms our internal criterion level. The internal criterion level constitutes several characteristics or features which is according to our likings, desires and our wants for a partner. Therefore, it is always a positive and unreal partner figure which is formed. Thus, we cannot get a good match of any person easily with our already existing mental partner model and we overlook other significant features of that person.
Hence, this always hinders in finding our true love.
2. Moving on is easier
There are some people who do not want to spend their energy on maintaining a relationship. They find it difficult to maintain a relationship because they believe that their energy is getting wasted. They find it easy and more efficient to use their energy in something else. Moving on from a relationship is easier and more fruitful for them. People holding this type of personality trait is easy going and do not want to stay within any bond. They consider it as a headache. Thus, it is pretty difficult for them to find their true love.
3. Healing stage
After a bad break up from a long-term relationship, it is very difficult for us to stand up and believe in love once again. A break up makes us weak and some people even suffer from depression, stress, and anxiety. This is a stage where people avoid interaction with any new person. They always want to stay aloof and heal within. Therefore, due to the lack of interaction with any new individual, who could be the true love, indentifying the true love becomes tougher.
In our ultra modernized society, people always stay busy in uplifting their status and self-esteem. Seeking the need for grabbing their self-esteem and high status in the society, people seek their career and run for making money, blindly. And this blocks the belongingness need within them which hinders their search for true love. Day-by-day people are getting more and more materialistic and shutting their eyes off from love. They have no time for thinking about love. This is especially because their priorities in life are quite different.
5. Past Relationships
Bad experiences from past relationships have always been a prime factor to hinder the search for true love. People always anticipate that a new relationship will again result in something same as the past ones. People even lose faith in the concept of love.
6. Emphasis on physical love
In modern day’s life, relationships remain pretty confusing. Definition of love has changed over time. The absence of commitment, passion, and overwhelming physical intimacy destroy the concept of true love where the balance among the three is important.
The concept of an open relationship is in the air nowadays. People are more physically connected and mental connections are a rarity. Couples become bored with each other after a while and they go out in search for someone else who can physically satisfy them more. Therefore, they ignore or overlook the other features in a person and they fail to be with their true love.
7. Devaluing self
There are some people who are very cautious about their appearances. They consider themselves as ugly, unattractive and ill-favored. They believe that due to their ugly appearance, they won’t be loved by anyone in their life. Therefore, they avoid social interactions with friends and anyone new, which makes it difficult for them to find the true love of their life.
8. Consider self as high
It is just the opposite of the former point listed. There are people who consider themselves as the best. They believe that they are examples of high beauty quotient. They always remain confident and egoistic. They do not interact with everyone. They consider themselves to be of high standard and they cannot find people matching their profile. Hence, they ignore people and consider them to be of lower status, which makes them blind and it becomes a hindrance finding the true love of their life.